We heard about this neat little park or petting zoo or something called “The Everglades” and decided to give it a visit. It was hellishly hot that day but, apparently, there were little lizards named “alligators” that lived in the park so we sojourned on.
![andy evrglds](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/dscf7253.jpg?w=470&h=352)
Andy standing in front of the sawgrass prairie. No alligators here!
![dscf72582](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/dscf72582.jpg?w=470&h=352)
A really big bug called a “lubber grasshopper.” They are about three inches long and dumb as rocks. Do you think the alligators will be bigger?
![caitlin mangrove](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/dscf7264.jpg?w=470&h=352)
Caitlin in the Strangler Fig Forest. Plenty of heat and mosquitos, but no figs. Or alligators.
![andy-tree](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/andy-tree.jpg?w=470&h=626)
Andy takes a moment to collect himself. Caitlin takes a moment to take an unflattering photo.
![vulture](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/dscf72731.jpg?w=470&h=352)
This is, perhaps, the most representative picture of the Everglades. Leading up to this moment, we had been swarmed – SWARMED – by mosquitos. As we walked down a path to a beautiful, placid lake, a cloud of the jerks rose up and nearly sucked us dry. Caitlin ran away and left Andy behind, who just stood there for some reason. We drove a little further to the coast. White sand, turquoise water, palm trees swaying in the breeze and swarms – SWARMS – of those cursed mosquitos. If our computers were cooperating, this is where we would have a video of Andy demonstrating the dire situation by stepping off the path, allowing a cloud of mosquitos to cover him, then freaking out and running away. After retreating into our car, the video would then show this vulture landing on a dumpster. And then another one. And another. And then twenty more. You would see how they surrounded our car and stared at us, patiently waiting our demise. I guess you don’t need the video after all.
![andy-breathe](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/andy-breathe.jpg?w=470&h=626)
Back inland at the pine forest, breathing in the fresh, mosquito-free air. Also, no alligators.
![sun](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/dscf7288.jpg?w=470&h=352)
Caitlin got artsy with the camera.
![tree-evrglds](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/tree-evrglds.jpg?w=470&h=626)
Is this an alligator? No, more artsy stuff.
![us and alligator](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/dscf72931.jpg?w=470&h=352)
Caitlin and Andy by the water.
![alligator teeth](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/dscf7295.jpg?w=470&h=352)
A rock.
![excited](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/dscf7296.jpg?w=470&h=352)
Andy is really excited for some reason.
![egret](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/dscf7302.jpg?w=470&h=352)
A white bird.
![turtle](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/dscf7306.jpg?w=470&h=352)
A green turtle.
And now…what you’ve all been waiting for…..
![alligator4](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/dscf7312.jpg?w=150&h=113)
![alligator8](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/dscf7319.jpg?w=150&h=113)
![alligator12](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/dscf7323.jpg?w=150&h=113)
LOTS OF ROCKS!!!!!!
![cute](https://wanderlustromp.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/dscf7361.jpg?w=470&h=352)
So, the Everglades were beautiful and all that, but we were a little disappointed. Weren’t there supposed to be alligators? All we saw were lots of rocks. Hissing, green, scaly rocks that pulled a German child into the water. Oh well, maybe next time.